The first time I cried over a boy was in the 3rd grade. My mom consoled me by telling me that I was beautiful and that if a boy was treating me exceptionally mean, he was hiding that he liked me. I felt much better believing what little girls everywhere are taught at a young age-that when boys chased us around the playground, pulled our hair and called us gross, it was really because they liked us.
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That dysfunctional seed gets planted early on. With that, sadly, most of us learned to believe that in order for someone to deal with their feelings of desiring another they have to either play the opposite game or run away. This need to cover up a positive healthy emotion of caring deeply about another person in a special, more than friends
Dating back and forth for a year never made sense to me.
Being an upfront person, I always wanted to say how I felt when I was crazy about someone. But throughout the years, I noticed that whenever I did, no matter how confident I was or how into me I thought someone was, 9 times out of 10 he was a goner. So I often played the game back because I had no other choice aside from moving the hell on to the next guy.
But I was young and stupid AF. And in most situations, the issue is usually along these lines:. A guy who feels the need to "Dating back and forth for a year" and switch you is insecure.
He can only confirm how great he is when a girl is chasing him and throwing herself at him, which is what he needs for that confirmation. What he really needs is a reality check, being a douchebag should not boost your ego, landing a girl who you are worthy of should.
Giving into his emotions of really liking you and wanting to be with you makes a fearful guy vulnerable. Strong men, however, will never react to fear and stay who they are regardless of their feelings for a woman. They also see committing to someone else as an opportunity to become a greater man, not a scared pussy.
This guy does not need a reminder of his lack of progression from anyone. What he fails to recognize is that by ruining things with someone who wants him regardless of his lifestyle, he stays stuck in that pattern that keeps him from moving forward in his life.
The next day, he texted...
The emotionally unavailable guy has underlying issues that he refuses to deal with. Guys who need to control every aspect of their lives have trouble relinquishing any part of themselves to anyone that can possibly change who they are or what plans they have set in their mind for themselves. Encountering anyone that might challenge their status quo will probably result in them ghosting to avoid losing control. This is why they often end something before it even starts, because they chose it- not someone else.
Smart girls should be able to tell the difference. Breaking patterns and confronting issues is never easy for anyone, especially men.
You look back and you just feel stupid. You reread every text. You relive every memory. And it all starts making sense — he never wanted love. He only wanted attention. He only wanted validation. I love the writing and the photos.
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You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. A website by Thought. How to Be Single The first time I cried over a boy was in the 3rd grade. And in most situations, the issue is usually along these lines: Insecurity A guy who feels the need to bait and switch you is insecure.
5 Honest Reasons Why He's...
Emotional Unavailability The emotionally unavailable guy has underlying issues that he refuses to deal with. Control Guys who need to control every aspect of their lives have trouble relinquishing any part of themselves to anyone that can possibly change who they are or what plans they have set in their mind for themselves. More From Thought Catalog.
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date back definition: to have existed for a particular length of time or since a particular time. Learn more.
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