When my ex-boyfriend and I broke up after being together for almost a year, he said he was too young to be tied down to just one girl and he had too many things on his plate his school, his band, etc.
He said I was his best friend and he would hate to lose me completely. Everything you see on the site right now: None of that existed until we made it exist. And on top of that, we both had full time jobs.
At that time, I got into a relationship with a girl I cared very much for. After all, we can save ourselves from all that time of running around meeting women, going on dates, etc.
The fact is, being in a relationship made me feel guilty. I would work a 9 hour work day, come home and then work on A New Mode until midnight. I started to feel bad about what our relationship was like.
I was basically just an exhausted body to sleep next to. I really liked the girl though and I hoped that things would just work out.
Truth is, I really did not have room for the relationship to be what I felt it needed to be. It would be one thing if it was a really loose, casual relationship. It would have been better for her and for me if I had either kept things casual or broke it off. So after about 8 months of me being pretty absent as a boyfriend, she left. It was hard for me to accept, but it was absolutely the right move on her part.
The good news is that after a month or two, we were able to get into the groove of being friends.
I wanted her in my life and I wanted her to be happy. She eventually started dating a new guy and I was fine with it.
Then she started plastering pictures of her and her new boyfriend everywhere on Facebook and to be perfectly honest it bothered me a bit, but I accepted it. Over the course of time, she started alluding to different things about her boyfriend or her relationship. I had mixed feelings about it.
On the one hand, I wanted her to be happy. No reason to push buttons. There came a point, though, where the way she was bringing up stuff about her current relationship became obnoxious.
It was gradual and for a while, I ignored her comments and the things she would slip into conversation. But over time, she kept subtly egging me on until finally it started to really annoy me. My annoyance was with the fact I could clearly see she was trying to push my buttons. When I saw beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was trying to rattle me, I had to cut her off.
The point of my story is that some of what she was doing was just her sharing her life naturally, but on some level some of it was to get a reaction from me. Want to marry a guy? Want to sleep with an entire football team? Want to hook up with my best friend? For me it was that I overestimated the extent to which I had made peace with the relationship being over. A lot of the time as men we need to make firm decisions and hide our mixed emotions.
I would say objectively that the guy needs to work stuff out himself. If hearing about My ex hates me and is hookup someone else moving on is making him upset, it would probably serve you best to cut each other off. At least, for a while.
My ex hates me and is hookup someone else with comments about a new boyfriend. It bums me out when I think about it, actually. Whether or not she was intentionally trying to push my buttons on some level, she was successful in getting me rattled after a while.
So in terms of how it relates to your situation: I knew being in a relationship was the wrong move for me at that time. I just wanted a friendship with her and I thought that I could fully accept her, no matter what she was doing. Bottom line here is: I would avoid getting back together, even if that option was back on the table. Things might be great at first, but the underlying reason why things ended will still be there.
People need to work out their personal issues before they can have a true relationship with another person, myself included again. Thank you Eric for sharing and to those who commented.
I needed to see and read it, just happened to bump into your post. I went through something like this as well. I was relieved that we broke up, to be honest, because it was give, give, give money and food-wise on my side, and take, take, take on his, as well as other issues.
A couple of days ago, my dad told My ex hates me and is hookup someone else that he saw him, and that my ex told him to ask me to call him. Long story short, I moved on quickly because I was already emotionally detached from the relationship, and found someone else. I said that I did, but what did he expect me to do?
Whine and cry about it? But he obviously thought I should have waited. HE broke up with me, after all. My ex boyfriend and I been broke up for only 3 months since he went back to his baby momma. Every since we have broke up maybe ones a month he message me just to say Hi and tell me about his daughter on Facebook but he still have my number on his phone because I text him back ask if he call me and he told me that his 2years old daughter accidentally dealing my number one day.
Some guy came set at my table and here comes my ex coming over to talk to me. All He talk about was his daughter. Why is he bring friendly to me. My ex boyfriend and I been broke for only 3 months since he went back to his baby momma. Every since we have broke up maybe ones a month he message me on Fa or text. My ex hates me and is hookup someone else needed to hear that. Even though we try to hide it.
I am so glad I read this post. The third time he broke up, I was devastated and begged him to re-think.